Showing posts with label hamms. Show all posts
Showing posts with label hamms. Show all posts
Friday, July 16, 2010
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Thursday, March 4, 2010
all here is golden...
(559): So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
(1-559): That depends on who this is.
all laughter today brought to you by texts from last night. here's a taste.
(310): So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
(520): my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
(309): We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
(484): I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
(918): i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
(765): you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
(803): Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
(720): i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
(407): i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
(774): i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
(519): and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
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